Hearth and home
Back home in the Philippines for summer break.
Went to HK; had some important stuff done. Brought lots of books too. Got back here in the Philippines, might have a summer job in my old high school since it’s in the middle of the semester for them. Also have to worry about my UQ research application. Reading Dostoevsky somewhere in the middle of these.
The Philippines seem to refuse to change everytime I go off somewhere. As though I had never left. As though the familiarity of returning home is so overwhelming that it forces the four months lived elsewhere to pale into a kind of memory oblivion. Must be the closest thing to a sci-fi memory wash, I think. I’m aware that something happened the last four months but every felt emotion seems to just have experienced a sheer drop in “reality” (e.g. was it ever real) from the change in environment. A metaphor in order? As though my life were a strip of cloth, and for the four months in Sydney, a small section was pinched and stretched from the “mainstream” and held to the side. So far so good. I’m aware of the change, it holds just as much validity in terms of reality, if not a heightened sense of reality. Coming home is like someone suddenly sewing up that pinched bit to permanently seal it off from the mainstream. Instead of a bend in the corner in life, it’s a little speed bump I have rolled over, an UNDER CONSTRUCTION SIGN that I went to, turned the wheel, shifted to reverse, and went the other merry way.
Thinking too much; God is already laughing at me, as Milan Kundera would say. Anyway, will be back in Sydney in February next year. But at least the Philippine economy has improved. PHP 49 to USD 1. Yessssss. Before I left for Beijing it was around PHP 57.